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Greetings. I am the Illusive One. For many years now I have been a huge video game player, movie viewer, and book reader. For almost as long, I have been a critic of these things and many people respect my opinions of these things and have often said I belong on G4 doing reviews on X-Play or a similar show. Sadly that is not likely to happen. So instead I shall do reviews for you, uninfluenced by other reviewers, of video games books, movies, and, occasionally, music and political actions. I hope you find this informative and helpful. Thank you for your time.

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Explanations for the Plot Holes of Star Wars and Lord of The Rings

            As most of my readers probably know, back in April I did my first Franchise V.S. Franchise post that put the Star Wars and Lord of the Rings film trilogies against one another and is currently my second most popular post.  I have to say, however, the backlash of choosing Star Wars over Lord of the Rings surprised me.  I was expecting a crowd divided in half but I actually found that most people agreed with my decision.  About two thirds of those I asked, emailed me, and commented on my post agreed with me when I choose the original Star Wars Trilogy over Lord of the Rings.  The remaining third was divided.  About half of that third either hadn't seen both trilogies, (that should be a crime), didn't like either, (an even bigger crime!), or were simply undecided.  The remaining half of that third liked Lord of the Rings more.  About three quarters of that half felt that Lord of the Rings was just ahead of Star Wars while the other quarter were just annoying, pissed off fan boys and very vocal about their objections to it and my debates with these fan boys have gone on to this day.
            But honestly, I'm sick and tired of fighting them so I'm offering an olive branch.  It's well known that both trilogies have tons of plot holes, both minor and major and I'm going to address all the ones I noticed and come up with explanations to them.  These are the Illusive One's Explanations for the Plot Holes of Star Wars and Lord of The Rings.


Star Wars Plot Holes


            Before I get this started, I have to say that the plot holes of Star Wars are pretty numerous but they are also very explainable.  With that said, here are Star Wars' plot holes and my explanations to them.


Plot Hole Number One
Princess Leia Leading the Empire
To the Hidden Rebel Base

            Yea, they really dropped the ball on this one.  If Leia knew they were being tracked, the logical choice would have been to ditch Han and the Millennium Falcon and contact someone to pick her up elsewhere before returning to the rebel base.  This probably had more to do with the strained budget George Lucas and his crew was working with more than anything else.  It and the shooting schedule were about the only things that Fox kept a tight leash on while the first film was being made so this plot hole can be blamed on that.  It can also be argued that the Rebels were trying to lure the Death Star to their own territory so they would have a better chance against it but that's still a big risk to take when they don't even know if the plans would reveal a weakness in the Death Star.  Other than that, I don't have anything for this one.  It's explainable, but not convincingly so.


Plot Hole Number Two
The Easy Destruction of
The Death Star

            This one annoyed me when I was doing my Star Wars V.S. Lord of the Rings Post but now I find it very plausible.  When you’re dealing with anything in space, the slightest miscalculation or bad design can cause catastrophic events and the Death Star was no different in this regard.  Even ground side there are many buildings that have been built and are being built where if one thing is hit the right way and with enough force it would cause the entire thing to collapse.  Once again the Death Star is no different in this regard.  It's just a machine/building that can be destroyed if you hit it the right way and there are things that the designers probably overlooked.  My honest guess in this matter is that when the Death Star was first being designed and built it probably had a lot more of these problems and this one was just a screw up. 
            Other people argue that because it was made by the Empire such problems shouldn't have existed.  That's just bullshit.  It's common knowledge that not everything governments make or arrange is top notch.  With such a massive construction like the Death Star, there was no way corners wouldn’t have been cut and many people would probably have been overworked to the point of collapsing.  Thinking that just because the government made it makes it immune to faults is just plain stupid.


Plot Hole Number Three
Apparently Little Time Passing
In the A New Hope

            The explanation to this one is simple.  More time passed off camera then on.  It's as simple as that.  More time probably passed in their trip to Mos Eisley then it was originally implied and the same goes for their trip from Tatooine to Alderaan, along with their time on the Rebel Base.  If you’re not satisfied with that just rewatch the movie and think on it for a while.  That said, let’s move on.


Plot Hole Number Four
The Exploding Walkers
In The Empire Strikes Back

            This really isn't so much a plot hole as it is nitpicking.  Throughout the battle on Hoth, several of the walkers exploded in the most random ways.  For example, they just shoot at one after it's been tripped and it just explodes despite the fact that they say that the walker's armor is too strong for blasters.  Later in the battle, Luke tosses a grenade, (or something like one), into the body of a walker and its head explodes.  I mean what the hell?  It's not really a plot gap but it's something that has bugged me more than any other problem in the original trilogy and not only is there no explanation for it but no one ever seems to address it.


Plot Hold Number Five
The Rebel Ships going into the direction
Of the Star Destroyers despite the fact they
Have infantine directions to flee in.

            This was one I really hadn't noticed until I saw the Family Guy episode Something, Something, Something Darkside.  Basically, the Rebel ships seem to fly in the exact direction the Imperial Star Destroyers are stationed despite the fact that they can flee in nearly every other direction.  This explanation is simple; the Star Destroyers moved off camera to intercept them.  Simple plot hole and a simple explanation to it.


Plot Hole Number Six
Luke Learning the Force from Yoda
In Apparently Little Time

            This is yet another one where it can be implied that more time passes off camera then on.  Some people tried to debunk this argument saying that little time seems to passes while Han, Leia and C3PO flee from the Empire and spends little time on Bespin.  Once again, it can be implied that more time in these places passes off camera then on.  While in space, they were probably hiding from the Empire for several days if not weeks.  Some people try to debunk that argument by saying that they wouldn’t have enough food for the time.  Seriously?  Han Solo is a fucking smuggler!  He has probably gotten into situations where he had to hide out for a while and had the Millennium Falcon stocked up for such occasions.  Where is this food?  Probably in some storage area where camera never went to.  The Millennium Falcon wasn't that small and there were undoubtedly many areas of the ship that we never saw.  Who honestly wants to see a kitchen or a bathroom in a space opera? 
            As far as their time in Bespin goes, they were fixing a hyper drive accelerator, not a bent fender.  Fixing something like that would probably take a few days at the very least and that time passed off camera as well.  The same could be said for their time imprisoned by Vader and the Empire.  It's something that a lot of people over analyzed and I, in turn, have explained it all away.


Plot Hole Number Seven
Lando Wearing Han's Cloths

            This is another thing that really isn't a plot gap so much as a nitpicking thing.  At the end of Empire, for some reason, Lando is wearing Han's cloths.  It's another thing that I hadn't noticed until I watched Something, Something, Something, Darkside and now it's something that I laugh at every time I see it.  The explanation is simple; he needed a change of clothes after all that crap that went down in Bespin and Han wasn't around object.  I'm honestly not sure I would have done any different. 


Plot Hole Number Eight
The Luke/Leia Incest Thing

            This is something that has been way too over analyzed and those who hate Star Wars blow this thing out of proportions.  However, when people argue on this, those who have over analyzed it base all of their arguments on the fact that Leia kissed Luke once on Hoth simply to make Han jealous.  But she did this without knowing Luke was her brother and it's not like they had sex or anything.  It's probably something they would shudder about and try to forget about later but over analyzing douchebags just blew it out of proportions and made into a big deal.  One of the over analyzing douchebags I know actually furthered this argument by using Leia's line “I know.  Somehow I've always known.” in Return of the Jedi.  More than likely, she always loved Luke like a brother and when she found out that he was her brother she just connected the dots.  So there is your explanation.  Now stop overanalyzing this!


Plot Hole Number Nine
Building a Second Death Star

            This is something that I acknowledge as cheep rehashing but it's also something that's grown on me.  The argument against this one was simple: Why built a second Death Star when the first was destroyed so easily?  Well, the explanation to this one was just as simple: Because it was a space station that could destroy an entire planet!  Would they have scrapped the Manhattan Project if the first A-Bomb had some faulty wiring?  Would they scrap an advanced submarine design just because an engineer messed up the way the propellers were supposed to turn?  From a creative standpoint it was a cheap rehashing but from a logical standpoint it makes sense.  It was the most powerful and advanced space station ever created and was something they would want to recreate.  To me the question isn't why would they build another one but why wouldn't they build another one?


Plot Hole Number Ten
Building the Shield Generator for the Second Death Star
On a Planet with a Hostel Population

            Hostel population?  You mean the Ewoks?  Honestly, if you hadn't seen the climax of Return of the Jedi, would you have thought they were a threat?  I mean, come on!  They're knee high and look like teddy bears!  If you had blasters and battle armor, would you really consider them a threat?  The film also seems to imply that before the final fight they hadn't been much more than an occasional annoyance for the Empire.  I admit they were a bit of a stupid solution but one I found plausible as well.


Plot Hole Number Eleven
The Final Space Battle

            This actually entails a number of plot holes that happened throughout the second half of the film, concerning the climax.  The first were the reports of the Rebel Fleet massing at a given location and the Emperor ignoring it.  Think on this for a minute.  He was trying to destroy the Rebel Alliance in one swift blow.  If he had sent the Imperial Fleet after them they would have scattered and avoided any kind of decisive fight, as it was implied that their tactics were mostly hit and run.
            The next issue people point out was the way the Death Star had been constructed, not being entirely finished and not having a shield generator of its own.  This can once again be answered by the ambush tactic the Empire was employing.  The whole idea of the attack was to destroy the Second Death Star while it was still in its construction phases.  If it was complete, it's that doubtful the rebels would have attacked it or have been ambushed by the Imperial Fleet. 
            As far as a shield generator for the Second Death goes, most of its power would probably have gone into its offensive capabilities.  I mean the Death Star has a big and powerful gun that probably would have sucked out most of its energy.  How would they have been able to put in a shield generator that would cover a space station that big without sucking away its fire power?  Once again, it wasn't complete and they were trying to draw the Rebel Alliance into a false sense of security.  The energy emitting from a shield generator of the magnitude would have stuck out like a sore thumb and kept the Rebels clear.


Plot Hole Number Twelve
The Planets Only Having
One Kind of Terrain

            This is yet another nitpicking problem that I have noticed.  For some reason, the main planets seem to have only one kind of Terrain.  Tatooine only seems to be a desert, Hoth an ice world, and Endor a forest.  But it's not like there aren't any planets that aren't like that.  Mars, for example, isn't much more then cold, red, desert and it's plausible that there may be planets out with similar, if not identical, environments.  The same works for Hoth.  There are even planets within our own solar system with entire surfaces covered in ice.  Hoth just took it a step further by adding snow.  As far as Endor goes, just think back to the era before man existed.  Every continent was covered in forests or rain forests with only a few wintery tundras in the north and south and few a deserts here and there to break them.  It's not at all impossible that, given the right conditions, the vast majority of a planet could be covered in woods.  Finally, we only saw a small portion of Endor and it could very well be that it has other terrain features we didn't see.


Plot Hole Number Thirteen
The Ending

            As I mentioned in my Star Wars V.S. Lord of the Rings post, this series had one of the best feel good ending I have ever seen but it still left a lot of questions as to what would happen next.  The original ending only seems to imply that a decisive battle had been won but never gave any indication that the war was over.  As a result, this ending is often discredited as several years of continuing civil war would most likely ensue.  However, this was more or less corrected by then ending in the 2004 DVD edition.  In it, they show added footage of the people of Coruscant, Bespin, Tatooine and Naboo celebrating the end of the empire and this ending felt more complete.  The other ending seemed to imply that the war would continue on for decades while this one seemed to imply it would be over in two years at the most.  It's not really a plot hole but it was something I felt I had to address.  The war certainly wasn't over but the 2004 ending implied that it would be soon, the hardest part of the battle was over and everything will soon fall into place.  And there's my explanation for the ending.          


Lord of the Rings Plot Holes

            Before I get started on this, I have to say that while the major plot holes of these films are less numerous they are a lot bigger and a lot harder to explain away.  That said, let’s move on.


Plot Hole Number One
The Protagonist Being Unaware that
The Mines of Moria had Fallen

            This one, I have to admit, has always bugged the crap out of me more than any other plot hole of any other series.  The argument against this one is simple: how did no one know that Moria had fallen even though the bodies within had clearly decomposing for years, if not decade?  This is one that Lord of the Rings fanboys tend to run to the book for but we are not talking about the books.  This is strictly for the films and as far as this is concerned the books don't exist.  The best explanation I've heard for this is that the dwarves are isolationists and have very little contact with each other.  Ok, but that still doesn’t explain how an entire city, rich of mithril fell to an army of goblins without anyone noticing.  Someone was bound to notice that something was wrong with Moria.  It's possible that no one in the fellowship actually knew about the incident and no one imagined that they would go through the mines.  However, Gimli suggests that they go through the mines multiple times, yet somehow he doesn’t know they fell.  How does that happen?  Wouldn't he have checked up on Moria before subjecting his companions to that hell?  In truth, I don't have a satisfying answer to this one and it's one that bothers me to no end.

Plot Hole Number Two
How did Aragorn Know what the Uruk-Hai are called
Despite the Fact no one Ever mentioned it but Villains
And Only to Other Villians?

            This is just a nitpicking problem and really isn't much of an issue.  But it still is a good question.  How did he know what they were called?  As far as I remember, no one ever called out their names other then Saruman in Fellowship and then all the heroes just seemed to know what they were called in Two Towers.  The only explanation I can think of is that Gandalf heard what Saruman was going to call them before escaping Isengard and told the others off camera.  It's very unlikely but this isn't a plot hole that warrants a loss of sleep.

Plot Hole Number Three
What Happened to the Elves at Helm's Deep?

            This is a question I have asked myself ever since I first saw The Two Towers in theaters.  What happened to them?  They were defending the Deeping Wall and after they retreat from it they just seem disappear.  I know for a fact that they weren't all killed defending the wall because you clearly see them defending the keep facing the Deeping Wall.  The only explanation I can offer for this one is that the remaining elves were killed off camera and I'm not even entirely satisfied with that answer.  I know a lot of my explanations cite events off camera events, but this one still bugs me.  I hope it's a good enough explanation for you because I'm at a loss on this one as well.

Plot Hole Number Four
The Ents just Appearing at the Destroyed
Borders of Fangorn Forest

            The argument against this is simple: where did all the Ents come from when Treebeard decided to go to war against Isengard?  Well, it's not like it was the first time the ents popped out of nowhere.  It just seems to be what they do.  They roam around the forest and just appear when they are needed.  I know it's there, but this is just another problem that doesn’t deserve to much thought.

Plot Hole Number Five
Minas Tirith

            Just Minas Tirith.  That city in itself was a plot hole.  I don't care what kind of technology or magic you have.  Building a city like that is impossible!  Not only that, it's just illogical and not very well made.  As a city it's too cramped and limited in space and as a fortresses, it's too easy to attack with way to many vulnerable positions.  But my explanation to this is simple:  Who the fuck cares?  It looked awesome!

Plot Hole Number Six
Gandalf's Staffs












            Weird sounding, I know, but his staffs are a plot hole of themselves.  For starters, Gandalf loses his staff at Isengard when Saruman takes it and captures him, yet he has it again when he is at Rivendell.  How the hell did that happen?  Did he just make a new one off camera?  One that happened to look exactly like his old one?  Or did it just teleport back to him after he escaped?  And why didn't he have his staff during the later parts of the battle of Minas Tirith?  Well, the extended edition does explain it.  In it the Witch King destroys it but that just opens up another plot hole.  If he destroyed it, how did he have it again at the film's ending?  Did he just make a new one?  I find that doubtful and the films seemed to imply that all of the wizards' power was tied into their staffs and when they lost them they lost their powers.  But still, that's something that is more reserved for the books so let’s just say they can make new ones in the films and there is you explanation.


Plot Hole Number Seven
The Army of the Dead

            The whole army of the dead thing was probably the biggest deus ex machina I have ever seen in any film.  The whole thing would have been ok if it hadn't been for one thing: Aragorn released them before the war was over.  Why would you release an invincible army of ghosts before you defeated a foe that has you out matched in nearly every way?  It's one that annoys me but it's one of the few Lord of the Rings plot holes I think up a good explanation for.  It's simple; Aragon wanted to do the honorable thing and let them go after the battle was done.  It's very possible that he thought this battle was the decisive battle of the war and they wouldn't be needed after.  It's an area where Aragorn really dropped the ball but it's an explainable plot hole.


Plot Hole Number Eight
The Soldiers at the Battle of the Black Gate

            Everything about the soldiers in this battle struck me as wrong.  For one thing, why weren't the Riders of Rohan on their horses?  Well, it is possible that they lost too many of them at the Battle of Minas Tirith.  It's also possible that they didn't think that this would be a field battle, so much as a siege of the Black Gates.  But if that's true they are even dumber then Aragorn for releasing the Army of the Dead before the war was over.  Speaking of Aragorn, where did his horse go?  For that matter, where did all their horses go?  Well, it is possible they let them to run away off camera so that's that issue resolved.  What really bothered me, however, were their tactics.  What kind of a commander lets his army be surrounded like that and why were they bunched together like a damn mob?  This one can be a nitpicking problem or a plot gap, depending on your view but it's one that I haven't heard a good explanation for.  It just irritates the crap out of me. 


Plot Hole Number Nine
Why did all of Mordor Collapse
After the Ring Was Destroyed?

            For some strange reason all of Mordor, a land just as big as Gondor completely collapsed after the Ring was destroyed.  The fortress of Barad-Dur and Mount Doom I can understand but why did an earthquake erupt and consume the Black Gates and all of the orcs in within Mordor?  It's a weird one but who cares?  It was awesome to look at and didn't impede the storytelling in the way the final plot hole does.


Plot Hole Number Ten
The Eagles at the Battle of the Black Gate

            This is the biggest plot hole in the entire series and is one that nearly destroyed the entire series' storytelling credibility.  The whole root of this is centered around one simple question:  Why didn't the fellowship simply fly to Mordor rather than spend a year walking their?  This is one that I have never heard a satisfying explanation to and I have heard them all and debunked them all.  To those of you who may try to explain this allow me to debunk you in advance.  For one thing, no one ever looks up.  Think about it.  How many times do you look up into the sky in day?  Even on the off chance an orc or one of Sauron’s minions noticed them, if the eagles were high enough in the sky and far enough away they probably would have thought they were just regular sized birds flying high.  Visual physics have weird ways of playing tricks on one's eyes when dealing with height and distance.  And even if they did know what they were what would they have done to stop them?  Only the fell beasts could fly and there were only nine of them and the eagles seemed to be able to take them on at the Black Gates. 
            It's one that no one has a credible excuse for.  Even the books, the thing that everyone runs to cover for in the plot gap department, have no plausible explanation for it and it was a major fuck up on Tolkien’s part.   They were really cool to watch and it was a nice little tribute to The Hobbit but it impede the storytelling process in such a way that it made all of the other plot holes I mentioned seem like minor film editing errors in comparison.  It truth, it is the biggest plot gap I have seen to any big film series.  It damn near ruined the credibility of the entire series and it's a plot hole I can't help but rant about.


            I honestly have no idea why so many people rant and nitpick about these plot holes.  Some, I admit, are legitimate questions but if someone is going to put so much effort into pointing out a plot hole and elaborating on how wrong they are, they should put just as much energy into thinking up explanations for them.  While there were plot holes I couldn't explain, I put as much thought and effort into explaining them as I did identifying the problem.  While I did notice these plot holes, (or had them pointed out to me), they never diluted the entire film experience for me.  Ranting and nitpicking about such things is becoming increasingly common, incredibly annoying and it's something that everyone is guilty of and is just wrong.  Is that we critique movies now?  By just ranting and nitpicking about all the things we didn't like? Or do we look at the big picture and how the films impacted our lives and imagination?  Think on this. 
            So until next time this is The Illusive One demanding a stop to ranting and nitpicking and that people focus on the big picture and enjoy films for what they are rather than nitpick the crap out of them.


 

Thursday, June 2, 2011

On the X-Men Films


            As I mentioned in My Thoughts on the Avenger Films post, the animated series based on Marvel comics were staples in my childhood.  The two that left the biggest impact, however, were the Spiderman and X-Men series.  So you can probably imagine my excitement when I heard that there was going to be a live action film adaptation of X-Men and as a kid I thought it was awesome.  Over ten years later, X-Men films are still being made and I keep seeing them.  With X-Men: First Class due for release later tomorrow, I decided that I would give my thoughts on films released so far.  This is the Illusive One's Thoughts on the X-Men Films.


X-Men

            When I first heard about this film, I damn near wet myself in excitement.  It was released in an era when live action adaptations of comic books were rare and it was even rarer to find a good one. So you can imagine my excitement when I heard about it.  As soon as I could, I got my parents to take me to see it and I loved every second of it.  But how well does it hold up today?  Well, here are my thoughts.
            It was released in 2000 and starred Hugh Jackman, Patrick Stewart, Ian McKellen, Holly Berry, Famke Janssen, and Anna Paquin.  The film deals with Wolverine, (Jackman) when he first joins the X-Men and their battles against Magneto, (McKellen), while the leaders of the world try to decide on how to deal with what they call the mutant phenomenon.
            On the positive side you had a lot of great casting choices.  The best, yet the strangest, was Hugh Jackman as Wolverine.  What do I mean by strange?  Well, before X-Men he was a Broadway dancer and singer from Australia and here he was playing a badass Canadian mutant with amnesia living in New York.  Very strange, yet they couldn't have picked a better actor for the part.  To me, Hugh Jackman is Wolverine and I doubt anyone will ever be better or be able to replace him.
            Despite this, there were many other great casting choices as well.  Patrick Stewart was also perfect as Professor X and Ian MaKellen was great as Magneto.  The rest of the cast were good in their parts but were outshined by the three I already mentioned.  In the end, however, these were characters that you couldn't help but love and sympathize with.  With them, you had a lot of underlying themes about being different and acceptance within society.  These themes were well put into this film and wasn't preachy or in your face about it
            There was also a lot of great interaction between the characters.  It was great to see how Professor X and Magneto interacted with each other.  It was obvious that these two were once friends, still wanted to be friends and want the same thing but were divided on how to get them.  The best of these, however, were the interactions between Wolverine and Cyclops.  These two just hated each other and argued with each other all the time.  Sometimes it was over Jean Gray, over leadership, or just over who has the bigger set.  Always bickering, always amusing, and always played well of each other.
            By today's standards and compared to the other films, the action scenes are fairly tame but I still enjoy them.  The fights between Wolverine and Mystique and Wolverine and Sabretooth on Liberty Island were the highlights of the films and I always enjoyed watching them.
            On the negative side, there really wasn't much to the film then what I mentioned above.  The first half was all introductions, bickering, and the second half was action.  The story and plot structure just never struck me as being well developed.  There isn't really anything in particular I can point out but it just seemed like the plot and events could have been better written.  Finally, I have to mention Sabretooth.  While I never read the comic books, I know for a fact that Sabretooth was Wolverine's longtime rival before he joined the X-Men.  In this film, however, he just came off as being Magneto's button man, despite the fact that they never met in the comics or any of the early animated adaptations.  It's something that didn't bother me at first, but now it just annoys me.
            All around, this film did have its faults but I loved it.  It's by no means a masterpiece and it could have been a lot better but it was a good start to the series, especially compared to all the other overrated first superhero films out there, (Iron Man I'm looking at you).

All Around
8/10

X-Men 2: X-Men United

          Now were getting into the real good stuff.  In my opinion, this is probably the greatest Marvel live action film ever made.  Released in 2003, the film continued the story of Wolverine as he tries to piece together his forgotten past.  Things get completed for the X-Men however, when a man named William Stryker captures Professor X and plans to use him and the Cerebro Machine to exterminate all the mutants.  As the film progresses, Wolverine finds that he and Stryker have a history together and wonders if his past is worth knowing. 
            On the positive side, all of the returning cast members return and all are just as good.  Brian Cox was great as Stryker and a worthy foe to bring Magneto and the X-Men together.  Once again, it keeps Wolverine's past obscure and gives you little hits of what it contains while never telling you the whole story.  It also showed Jean Gray losing control of her powers.  At times her powers spiked then abandoning her completely and made for an unpredictable quandary.  The interactions and dialog between the characters were even better then those of the first film.  The tension between the X-Men and Magneto was obvious and made for a great uneasy alliance.  All the themes evolved in the first film and animated series were still in play and much better used this time around.  This time around we saw the radicalism in humans against the mutants and made for a welcome shift in the plot.   
            Then we have the action scenes and, my God, they were great.  There weren't as many, but in this case less was more.  The best one was when Stryker invaded the school and Wolverine went berserk on his soldiers.  There was also a good fight between Wolverine and Deathstrike but the first fight was better.
            On the negative side Professor X was Stryker's prisoner throughout much of the film and this annoyed me.  Cyclops' involvement was also minor and they made minor characters more prominent in this film.  Neither of these things were necessarily bad things for the film but they just weren't things I expected or cared for.  There were a few little moments I hated as well but those are just nitpicking problems.
            All around, however, this was the best of the X-Men films and probably the best live action Marvel adaptation.  The action was good, the acting and interactions were great, and it brought a satisfying closer to Wolverine search for his past and leaves you hopeful for the future of the mutants but not entirely sure what will happen next.  If they had ended the series here, I would have been satisfied.  And now I really wish that had.

All Around
9/10

X-Men 3: The Last Stand

            This was where the films started to go downhill.  The third film begins as Cyclops is still grieving over Jean's death and a cure is found for the mutants.  As you can imagine, this infuriates Magneto who builds an army to fight against what he considers a threat to his race.  Not long after, Jean returns, having survived, but now has an uncontrollable power within her that has taken on a life and consciousness of its own.
            On the positive side, there was a lot of cool action in it, particularly the final fight where the X-Men go against the Brotherhood.  I also felt that Vinnie Jones was good as Juggernaut but unfortunately, that's all this film had going for it.
            Nothing about this film was as good as its predecessors.  The acting was worse, the interactions were worse, and the dialog was worse.  Even the final fight made next to no sense.  Do you really expect me to believe that a hand full of X-Men and a few disorganized soldiers could take on Magneto's entire army of mutants?  It just went way to over the top.  Not only that but the themes involved were shoved in your face for about five minutes and then never mentioned again.  Whereas the previous two films dealt with Wolverine’s past, this one ignored it completely.  In the end, that sacrificed plot, dialog, and character development for more action.  THAT pissed me off beyond belief!
            Speaking of characters they killed some of them off way to fast.  I don't mean to spoil anything, but Professor X and Cyclops were dead before the film was half way through.  That's just wrong!  Finally, there was the ending.  Once again, I'm going to spoil something.  Whereas the first two left the fate of the world ambiguous this one practically screamed it's already been worked out and, in the process, lost the realisms the first two films had.
            Well, that made me sound like a pissed off fan boy didn't it?  But in the end, when you compare it to the first two, it just sucks.  I'm not saying that there isn't a good thing or two about but it was just a shitty action movie whereas the first two were intelligent, well made films as well as popcorn movies.  I would be lying, however, if I said I didn't enjoy it.  While it is a terribly flawed film and complete crap compared to the first two, it was a decent action movie and gave it an ok ending to the trilogy.  It was cool to see the films go back to the X-Men vs. Brotherhood roots and the final fight was cool to watch on the big screen.  But in the end, it's the worst of X-Men films.

All Around
6.75/10

X-Men Origins: Wolverine

            This is a film that is often been deemed to be the worst of the X-Men film, but I'm not entirely sure why.  Think I'm crazy?  Well, here are my thoughts.
            Released in 2009, this film dealt with Wolverine’s story before he lost his memory and showed how he lost it and how he got his adamntium skeleton.  In the process we learn about his troubled relationship with his half brother, Victor Creed, and how he and Stryker first met.
            On the positive side the opening credits were great.  It shows Wolverine and Victor Creed/Sabretooth, (although I'm sure this isn't the same character from the first film), fighting in different wars throughout the years, spanning from the Civil War to the Vietnam War, (I couldn't help but think that the two belonged their).  The acting in this film was also good and better then the acting in The Last Stand.  Hugh Jackman is once again great as Wolverine, Danny Huston was great as the young William Stryker, and Liev Schreiber was great as Victor Creed/Sabretooth.  Taylor Kitsch was also good as Gambit, (a character I wish had been in the trilogy), Kevin Durand was good as The Blob, and I couldn't really find anything wrong with Will.i.am as John Wraith.  Ryan Reynolds was also good as Deadpool, but the advertisements and promoters blew him out of proportions.
             I also thought the action was good to and much better than that of The Last Stand and on par with the action of the first two films.  It got back to the one on one death matches between the mutants and those are the things I loved about X-Men in the first place.   I also liked the way the opposing sides went after each other in smaller numbers and never went to over the top. 
            On the negative side, all the themes from the trilogy were mostly non-existent.  Although Stryker still plans the genocide of mutants he wasn't nearly as intelligent or as diabolical as he was in X2 and seemed to go about it in the wrong way.  In fact, the whole plot seemed to take more inspiration from the comics themselves rather than reality.  If the first two films hadn't taken themselves so seriously, this would have been ok.  But because they did it makes this one stick out like a sore thumb. 
            The only other problem I had with it was the ending and the events in relation to the main films.  It struck me as odd the way Wolverine just went lone wolf after he loses his memory.  It just didn't seem like something anyone would do given the situation.  Finally, like all prequels, there were next to no references to its events in the main films.  It's a problem that all prequels suffer from and a problem that has always annoyed me.
            After that, it's all nitpicking.  A lot of people didn't like the fact that the film was a revenge story but I didn't care one way or another about it.  A lot of people didn't like the dialog and I admit some of it was pretty cheesy, particularly involving the farm family Wolverine runs into.  Speaking of which, it always struck me as odd that they didn't have much of a reaction to the fact that Wolverine somehow sliced their sink in half.  There was also an action sequence where he jumped out of an exploding van into a flying helicopter.  In the end, all of these little problems did dilute the experience for me but they didn't bother me enough to ruin the whole experience for me.
            In the end, I liked this movie a lot more then The Last Stand.  It's not nearly as good as the first two but as prequel, but I felt it was satisfying.  It gave us a good, detailed background story of Wolverine and, while I felt it was unnecessary, it was well done.  In the end, most of the problems are just nitpicking issues, and it's really not as bad as everyone says.  It's nothing more than a popcorn film but still one worth watching.

All Around
7.5/10

            And those are my thoughts on the X-Men films.  The first film was a good start if a little underwhelming by today’s standards.  The second was a masterpiece of the genera and I believe it's the best live action marvel adaptation ever made.  I felt that the third was a shitty but satisfying film.  The fourth one was as well but I liked it more the third.  X-Men: First Class is due for release later this week and I really don't have much hope for it but I hope I'm wrong in this regard.  It looks like it's going to go back to the themes of the first two films but also looks like it's going to be a popcorn movie as well.  Let’s just hope it succeeds in being as intelligent and well made as the first two.  So until next time, this is the Illusive One saying that every few hundred millennia evolution leaps forward.

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

On the 2011 Spring Season Finales

            Well, it's June and all the season finales of the big shows have aired.  Having seen most of them, I decided to give my thoughts on the finales of my favorite shows.  This post will contain my thoughts on the season finales of C.S.I., Family Guy, Fringe, House, Law and Order: S.V.U., N.C.I.S., The Big Bang Theory, The Event, and The Mentalist.  While there are other shows out there that I like, these are the ones that I made a point of seeing.  They were the ones I looked forward to seeing and probably would have gone insane if I hadn't seen them.  That said, here are my thoughts on the 2011 Spring Season Finales.


C.S.I
          Like most season finales, this one had been building up over the past few episodes.  In it, Ray Langston has finally caught up with Nate Haskell and kills him very early in the show.  However, the death happens off camera and the rest of the C.S.I. Team has to determine if Ray killed Haskell in self defense or in cold blood.  In the process they discover Haskell's first victims and how he developed into a serial killer.  The only negative thing I have to say about it is that the acting at the beginning seemed a little bland.  Other then that the episode was good.   It wasn't the best of C.S.I.'s finales but it wasn't the worst either.  It was interesting to see how Haskell developed as a serial killer and it brought about a satisfying conclusion to Langston's and Haskell's conflict.  If you like C.S.I. and have been following the season, I say give this one a watch.


Family Guy
            Like last year, this season ended with an hour long reenactment of Star Wars, this time of Return of the Jedi, entitled It's A Trap!  This one, however, I actually saw it back in the winter when it came out of DVD so it wasn't as funny watching it again.  There were also quite a few jokes and gags that were cut out of the TV release but it was still enjoyable.  While it wasn't as funny as Something, Something, Something Darkside, it still was still hilarious.  If you like Family Guy and you like Star Wars and liked the previous two reenactments you'll like this one to.

Fringe
            Now this was a weird episode.  In it we get a glimpse of what will happen in the future in the world of Fringe.  In it, the other dimension has been destroyed and as a result the world where out protagonists live is falling apart as well and will soon be destroyed.  In this regard it was interesting to see how the characters would develop, given the circumstances but it ended on a very annoying cliff hanger.  Before it got to this, however, there was one moment that was incredibly tense and I thought the characters were going to start shooting each other.  In the end, it was probably the worst of Fringe's season finales but it was still satisfying and got me hyped for the next season.

House
            Now this is an episode I could make an entire commentary track for but I'll spare you that pain.  This one has a frame narrative in which House apparently beat the crap out of both Cuddy and Wilson and the build up to this was incredibly suspenseful and kept the viewer on edge.  Throughout much of the episode House is recovering from leg surgery and trying to patch things up with Cuddy while working on a patient’s case.  Hugh Laurie gives his usual great performance and all the other cast members were great to.  The best twist in this episode had to do with Taub but I won't dare spoil that for you.  Last to comment on is the final scene.  I won't spoil it for you but it was probably the biggest wtf moment of all the season finales.

Law and Order: S.V.U.
            There really isn't much to say about this one as it really just felt like another episode.  In it, a rape victim is killed not long before she has to testify in court and Stabler and Benson try to find who is responsible.  As I said, it was just another episode.  I think my biggest problem with it, however, was how it got pro-gun control at the end.  S.V.U. usually has themes that are liberal bias and aren't subtle about it but this one just annoyed me.  It seemed like they were trying to be subtle about it but didn't succeed in it at all.  In the end it was probably the worst of the season finales I saw last month.

N.C.I.S.
            Another one that had been built up, this season finale had the N.C.I.S. team finally confront the Port to Port killer, a serial killer who frequently popped up throughout season.  In the end, they make it a revenge trip for the killer and just stuck me as being a bit bland.  All the good stuff regarding the killer’s identity, motives and his more noteworthy victims had happened in previous episodes.  This one, once again, ended on a cliff hanger regarding a leak in the agency but failed to get be hyped for the next season.  Although one of the final scenes in it made my eyes water, it was just ok in the end.

The Big Bang Theory
            As this is a sitcom, I'll keep this one brief.  Leonard and Priya’s relationship takes an unexpected turn, Bernadette gets her PHD and causes Howard to feel inadequate, and Penny does something she never thought she would.  All around it was hilarious and a good ending to the season.

The Event
            In this one, Sean, Vicky, Sterling, and Simon try to stop Sophia from unleashing a deadly virus at Dallas airport while President Martinez tries to get his office back from Jarvis.  Before I get any further into the episode let me say that this is a series I cannot recommend highly enough.  I think it would be safe to say that it was intended to fill the void created when Lost and 24 ended last year and in this regard, it works.  It's suspenseful, it's action packed, and it's supernatural and is one series you need to see and the season finale no different.  It kept you on the edge of your seat and had you rooting for the good guys the whole way.  The last thing to mention is the final minute in the episode.  I won't spoil it for you but it will leave you bug-eyed in disbelief.  Unfortunately NBC canceled the series so the producers are looking for a new home for the show.  Let’s hope they find it before the summer ends.

The Mentalist
            And last we have The Mentalist.  Like previous season finales, this one had Patrick hunting for Red John.  It was a two hour season finale in which Red John is hunting for Hightower, who he had previously set up for murder earlier in the season.  Like other finales such as C.S.I. this one delivered a satisfying closer to the events of the season and made way for the next.  The only problem I had with it was the final confrontation between Patrick and Red John, as I found it a little hard to believe that he would expose himself the way he did.  Still, it wrapped up the events and conflicts of the season nicely and I would have been satisfied if the series ended there.



            And those are my thoughts on the season finales of my favorite shows.  If you disagree with my opinions on the matter, I encourage you to comment as to why but I doubt you'll change my mind on the matter.  If you haven't already seen these episodes I would recommend seeing the ones I liked, so long as you like the shows.  So until next time, this is the Illusive One tuning out.