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Greetings. I am the Illusive One. For many years now I have been a huge video game player, movie viewer, and book reader. For almost as long, I have been a critic of these things and many people respect my opinions of these things and have often said I belong on G4 doing reviews on X-Play or a similar show. Sadly that is not likely to happen. So instead I shall do reviews for you, uninfluenced by other reviewers, of video games books, movies, and, occasionally, music and political actions. I hope you find this informative and helpful. Thank you for your time.

Friday, September 23, 2011


            As my more dedicated readers know, back in May I did an article dedicated to all the Avenger related films in preparation for the release of the Thor and Captain America films but it took me a while to finally get around to seeing either of these films.  Why did it take me so long?  Well, I always have caution when it comes to films that have commercials showing almost nothing but action sequences and the main character and a love interest kissing.  To me, that's never a good sigh and more often than not, I'm right in this regard.  So I saved my ten bucks and just decided to wait a few months for it to be released on DVD.   So, should I have spent my ten bucks on it in theaters or was I right in waiting for its DVD released?  Well let’s find out.  This is The Illusive One's Review of Thor.

            The film revolves around Thor, (duh), played by relative new comer Chris Hemsworth as he starts what could lead to a war between the gods of Asgard and the Frost Giants of Jotunheim.  To punish him for this, his father Odin, played by Anthony Hopkins, sends him to Earth to learn humility and possibly atone for what he has done.

            On the positive side, I have to say the characters were really interesting, likeable and I wanted to know more about them.  Thor was interesting in the way a lot of arrogant warriors are.  Their ass holes but you can't help but like them.  Others like Loki, the Gate Keeper and Thor's band of warriors were all interesting as well and kept you interested in them.  Granted they weren't that original and didn't really leave much of an impression but they were still good for what they were.  Professor Selvig, played by Stellan Skarsgard was also good in his role but I think he may have been a bit downplayed.  Like he was intended to have a larger role but was cut down for the sake of time.  The other characters were also good for what they were but were relatively forgettable in the grand scheme of things.
            I also felt that the concepts of the Norse Gods were also really cool and creative.  One thing I never understood though is if they were supposed to be aliens.  Anyone have any thoughts on that?  And are they immortal?  It certainly suggests that they are but I'm honestly not sure.  Likewise I really loved the look of the Frost Giants in this film.  They were threatening, demented and looked different from any other rendition of frost giants I had seen before.
            The last good thing I have to mention about this film is that there were a few good one liners that brought a smile to my face.

            However, I would be lying if I said this move didn't have its faults and it had a lot of them.  For starters, the whole thing seemed rushed.  I think Thor spends a total of two days on Earth, yet he goes, (and I use that word very loosely), through all this character development and forms relationships with all these people.  As a result, it seems very forced and, for a lack of better word, unconvincing.  One moment he's this arrogant warrior with a love for battle and a day later he has a lot more value for life.  It just didn't sit well with me and seemed unconvincing and rushed.
            Speaking of which, the plot wasn't very good.  The concept for it was, but the execution wasn't.  As I mentioned it was very rushed and was way too predictable.  Just about everything that happened in this film I saw coming a mile away.  I can think of only one instance where I was surprised in this film but that's it and even those surprises weren't big shocks to me.  I'm not sure if it was the writing, the acting, or the directorial style but they just seemed like underwhelming twists.
            Then we have the action scenes and, my God, these were dull.  Wait, I take that back.  They weren't dull.  They were underwhelming.  At times they seemed very traditional, but even those weren't very well choreographed and seemed to suffer from a lot of editing issues.  Other times, they just sucked.  Take for example, the fight in the town with that...robot thing.  Underwhelming, poorly choreographed, and had a very anticlimactic conclusion.  Hand in hand with the action are the special effects.  I don't want to say they were terrible, but they really could be bad at times.  Whenever I saw Asgard, I was always aware that I was looking at a CGI effect.  Their just didn't seem to be any attempt to make the buildings look real.  The same goes with some of the frost giants.  When they were GCI, moving, or fighting, they looked like crap and almost as if they weren't finished effects.
            Last but not least is the acting and dialog.  There really isn't a whole lot to say about it, other then, it was all really hokey.  And I mean, really hokey.  Granted there are a few good lines every now and then but for the most part, it was just...well hokey and that's all I have to say about it.

            All around, I think the best word to describe this movie is ok.  It's not bad, but it's not great either.  It just stuck me as being rushed and underwhelming.  I certainly enjoyed it but I don't think it's anything special.  It's not as good as the Iron Man films and is more or less on par with The Incredible Hulk but I think it's safe to say that, out of the Avenger films, it's probably the worst.  That doesn’t mean the film is bad or anything but it just seemed like it could have been a lot better.  I would certainly recommend it to other people and, to be perfectly honest, I really want to see a sequel to this film but on its own it just ok.  It's worth anyone's time, but it's just ok.

All Around

            So that's my opinion on Thor and I know a lot of you are probably pissed at me for trying to slaughter a sacred cow, but we all have our own opinions and I'll respect yours as long as you respect mine.  If you don't....well...go fuck yourself because I don't have time for people like you.  So until next time this is The Illusive One sighing off.

1 comment:

  1. You really nead to nitpick less... Of course Asgard is CGI, it's *#$%ing Asgard, yet I was awestruck by it. I liked the action scenes, and you're ALWAYS too whiney about those. And yes, the dialogue was hokey, but it was enjoyable. And the Norse gods were EXCEDINGLY well done. Once again, have an open mind and try to enjoy yourself IO,you think too much.